Lenten Series, Week One: Ambiguity

Living Faithfully in an Ambiguous World

During these 40 days leading up to Easter Sunday, our writers have decided to use the writing of Henri Nouwen as the source of inspiration for the Abundant Aging blog. Specifically, his work published in “Bread for the Journey: A Daybook of Wisdom and Faith” provides us the seeds for our ponderings in the next several weeks. So, I begin with ambiguity.

“Our hearts and minds desire clarity. We like to have a clear picture of a situation, a clear view of how things fit together, and clear insight into our own and the world’s problems. But just as in nature colors and shapes mingle without clear-cut distinctions, human life doesn’t offer the clarity we are looking for. The borders between love and hate, evil and good, beauty and ugliness, heroism and cowardice, care and neglect, guilt and blamelessness are mostly vague, ambiguous, and hard to discern.

It is not easy to live faithfully in a world full of ambiguities. We have to learn to make wise choices without needing to be entirely sure.”

20/20

I believe that in this auspicious year of 2020, there will be many conferences and events, gatherings and occasions that will focus on the notion that hindsight is 20/20. The alumni weekend for my alma mater is one example where people will be encouraged to look back and see the world with clarity. Because we all want clarity!

I am in my 47th year of needing vision correction. When my glasses are off, the world is anything except clear. When my lenses need to be updated and the horizons appear ambiguous, I feel less than myself. Quite frankly, I feel dumb because when I can’t see clearly, I can’t receive all of the cues and information about the world around me. To say that I need clarity is literally a physical necessity.

And yet, when the glasses are off, I adjust how I take in the cues from my surroundings. Sounds become more important. I rely more on touching things. And I slow down and am more cautious in moving around my space. It is as if I am in the midst of an impressionist painting. The edges and distinctions are fuzzy —borders between objects and depth perception less clear. And I have to work differently to engage in the world. I am less sure and more cautious.

Hindsight

If only we had lenses we could put on, like a newly prescribed pair of glasses, to help us see and understand life more clearly. If only we could pause and fast forward from this moment to look back and see if the choice we are about to take is really the right choice.

This is, perhaps, one of the gifts of living a long time. Years of experience, which have been sifted through self-discovery and learning, provide a kind of hindsight that wise older adults have in comparison to those who are younger. This is a part of wisdom.

Experience

An older adult will face new choices and new decisions, but they have the opportunity to come to conclusions based on previous lessons learned. It is a sort of pseudo hindsight without technology or magic of time travel!

Longevity and years of learning also provide the opportunity to understand that hindsight is not always 20/20. Sometimes we have to make decisions based on our own experience along with the insight of others who hold additional pieces of information. The ambiguity of new situations and different circumstances requires us to venture forward, particularly when we are not sure of the outcome or result. It can be like recognizing that you need to see something more clearly and a friend offers their reading glasses in order for you to read the fine print. We must learn to ask to borrow the glasses, and even then, we may not see completely clear because their prescription is different from our own.

As you venture out today, may you spend some time viewing things through the fuzzy blur of ambiguity. May you find new ways to recognize the shapes and colors around you. May you discover peace even in the midst of uncertainty. And may you reach out to companions on the way and ask if you might borrow their glasses as you consider new ways to see the world.

2/26/20 16:43